How I Mother With Peace In My Heart

One of my new favorite verses is Isaiah 26:3 “You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you.” I don’t know about you but peace is not something I find very easily. It’s not the amount of kids or the stress of juggling homeschooling and Christian school. It isn’t managing an online business, blog, and finding time to write. The circumstances in my life has always been busy.

Last night I had someone again comment on my five kids with “I don’t know how you do it…” What she meant was I don’t know how you manage to keep your cool and take care of five kids. What I wanted to say was, “After five kids I’ve learned life will just be crazy, but peace is found in my heart – not in the swirling whirlwind of my life.” Sometimes I take a step back and look at my life and think, “How DO I do it?!” Then I remember I’ve not always been so calm. I remember the hardest transition was going from one to two kids. With a toddler who had a tendency to wander in the stores and a baby on my hip, I struggled to keep calm. In fact, I lost my cool too many times.

Listen, after five kids I’ve learned five truths about parenting and motherhood which have lead me to this heart of peace. I don’t have it altogether. I’ve made this list for MYSELF because I am very forgetful. I need these reminders for me today. I’m far from perfect peace, but I’m learning a few things I hope these truths encourage your heart:

1. Keeping God first. I always try to keep my identity wrapped in Christ. The moment I begin to look to my children to fulfill me is the moment I begin to lose the peace God has promised me. Only He can give me the peace I long for, so keeping my eyes focused on Him is my number one priority.

2. Learning to say no. I can’t do it all. I can’t. So I find help; I say no to activities; and I judge whether an activity will cause me a great amount of stress before I say yes to it. A lot of my stress in parenting has come from saying yes to things I didn’t have the emotional or physical space to do well.

3. Stress is a choice. Sometimes I don’t have a choice and I need to do something which requires a lot of juggling and planning. But it is my choice not to be stressed. It might not be my choice to have to run people to practice or sit with my other four kids while one does therapy. But it will be my choice if I’m stressed.

4. Stopped caring if I’m “on time.” Believe me, I do my very best to be timely. And that usually means I start getting them ready about 30 minutes before we actually have to leave. But if a bathroom accident or someone can’t find their shoes last minute I can either choose to get upset or I can say: We will just be a few minutes late. And being late is better than me yelling at my kids.

5. Leaving the rewards up to God. I’d love to be thanked for all of the laundry I’ve folded or messes I’ve wiped up on my hands and knees. But I may never be thanked. And that’s ok. It really is. Because the rewards I receive are enteral and God holds it all in His hands.

After all, we don’t do this mothering thing on our own. You might not have a husband to help, but you have a God who walks with you, and He loves you like no other. Ultimately the peace in our hearts comes when we place our circumstances in God’s hands.

Isaiah 26:3 “You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you.”

When Isaiah wrote these words the kingdom was about to be overthrown by a foreign country. A lot of people were going to die and life as they knew it would be over. Pretty stressful, huh? Only Isaiah said even in the middle of the most stressful situations we can find peace. Trust God. Paul expands on this in Philippians 4. He says peace is found in prayer and practicing what we know to do. True peace in mothering forms from a deep trust in God.

True peace in mothering comes from a deep trust in God. #momupbook

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Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; 7 and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus……The things which you learned and received and heard and saw in me, these do, and the God of peace will be with you. Phil. 4:6-7, 9

So keep the God of peace close to your heart and come to Him in prayer. You find the peace to keep mothering. One of the best new books for 2019 is Mom Up. In this amazingly true and beautifully written book, you will find the encouragement to keep going in your mothering journey. Not only does Kara-Kae actually live out her message, she is such a dear friend who truly is the best mom-encourager I know! Her life is a reflection of what I’ve talked about above. True peace in mothering forms from a deep trust in God.

Part four is my favorite: A Thriving Mom Rests in the Lord. Not just because I love naps, but because of this:

“The problem is not with a cup of coffee or al little pampering. The problem comes when we look to these things to refresh and energize us rather than asking God to give us His rest….A rest that renews, refuels, and reignites your soul, leaving you full of the goodness of God. I’m talking about true refreshing rest that only comes from the Lord.” Mom Up by Kara-Kae James

Every mom can identify with the feeling that they’re in a race to the finish line every day, stumbling over everything in their path—including Legos and dirty laundry!

Kara-Kae James knows how overwhelming motherhood can be. As she writes, “When we come to the place where we think that we have failed—this is the moment when God’s Word and motherhood intersect.”