A Letter to My Hurting Friend
Dear friend,
I am writing this to you because I can’t say all of this in person. I see you in the hallway and I can’t seem to find the words. The tears come too easily when we meet. I’ve avoided talking to you, but not thinking about you. The loss, the pain, and the utter heartbreak seem too big. So much pain and so unfair. I wanted to scream at God when I heard the news. I’ve struggled with what I would say to you.
I know I’ve texted, called, and sent messages. I try to fill my words with love for you, but I also want to fill your heart with truth. I cannot ask God what He is doing in your life, because I question His goodness if I look only at what it seems He is doing. Instead, I ask God, who is He in this tragedy? He is the same. He is love. He is good. I see now, truth must be solid before the floods come, but your floods are here. So how is truth to stand in all of the waves?
The truth is this:
God is strong.
God is all-wise.
God is so very good.
God is faithful.
God is just.
How do I convey truth to you, when it hurts to even breathe thinking of your loss? I am praying for you. Those words seem empty and shallow. But I am praying. I’ve never stopped praying for you. From getting on my knees at night to the quick whispers when I see your status on Facebook. I whisper prayers of peace, comfort, and love on your behalf to our Father. In the middle of the prayers, I see God kneeling beside you.
Do you know He catches all of your tears in a bottle? He does. No tear is wasted dear friend. There are so many, I know. You have so many, more than the stars in the heavens. But the tears are watering the ground. I know you feel like something inside you has died. And the hole it left is going to suck you in and make you disappear. God is there in the darkness.
In the darkness He creates light. The light is small, maybe you can only see it from afar, but your light still shines. In the way you trust Him. In the way you want to study His Word and are seeking answers to who He is. That is light dear friend – from YOU.
In all of this sadness, He still gets the glory. You are still alive. You are still moving one day at a time. Can I whisper the greatest truth you might need to hear right now? Walk one day at a time.
Our God is a very present help in trouble. The earth may melt away, and it feels like it might have already, but God is right there. In the ordinary moments, He is holding you. As you make your way to work, only to come home to an empty house, the sadness has all but left you empty. God is filling you again. Life has moved on for everyone but you. It hasn’t moved on for God. He is still in the dark, crying beside you. With His arms wrapped around you, He is comforting you in the quiet. Find some quiet to feel His arms around you. And I’ll be those arms too.
So the the next time I see you, expect a hug. No words. Just silent prayers and maybe a tear, but definitely a hug.
He is comfort.
He is peace.
He is love and joy.
He has wrapped your sorrow around Him and catches all of your tears.
Lots of love,
From a friend who is lifting you up
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Blessings.
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I love this, friend. The upcoming season can be so hard for so many.
I’m that hurting friend, Sarah and it helps to get a glimpse of the anguish friends go through as they tip-toe around me this week. It’s not easy for them either and I try to remember that in the midst of my own pain. I’m pinning this to my Shining Through the Grief board on Pinterest right now!
Thanks so much for sharing this perspective.
Blessings and smiles.
Sarah, what a powerful post! I pray many “hurting friends” will find their way here. I hope I have a friend like you when ever I’m hurting. Blessings!
I have a friend who is in a deeply difficult position too. it’s so very hard to know what to say that will mean anything… but I keep praying. I think that it’s imperative that when we tell someone that we are praying, that we actually DO IT! sometimes we think that is the last thing to offer when we don’t have anything else to do, but actually, it’s the first and best thing we can ever do for anyone, anywhere, anytime. thanks for your good words!